Church Shopping vs. Church Staying
Written by Alexis Faubel
As a first-year student, all of my new Chi Alpha friends were attending different churches across the city. And while I participated in the classic “church shopping” that often accompanies a new move before I knew it, 6 months had gone by and I still hadn’t settled on a church.
After visiting several churches, the biggest piece of advice was from my campus director - “Just pick a church. Doesn’t matter which one, just pick one and commit to it.” It was blunt, but he made a point. Besides sharing major theological beliefs (we’ll get to that below), picking a church is truly based on preference - not perfection.
You will NEVER find all that you want within a church. That doesn’t exist. You will always find something that can be improved upon or doesn’t match your pre-conceived expectations.
Hopefully, that reality brings you some peace in knowing that it comes down to a clear set of necessities, and then ultimately, preference. I say to emphasize the multitude of church options our American context gives us, and as a warning against many Christian’s tendencies to over-spiritualize the church search simply because they don’t prefer one over another. Just because one place worships differently than what you are used to, it does not mean there is a theological hole in their function.
What should we look for, then?
There are many good things churches can offer. And it is important to weigh the core elements against your core beliefs.
A couple of questions you could ask are: Do they believe in Jesus as God? Is their foundation on the Bible as the Word of God? Do they believe in the power and presence of the Holy Spirit? What about salvation and baptisms?
These issues are central to our belief systems and can be helpful in searching for which churches align with our beliefs… but you may also find that every church you were considering falls under that.
From this point, there are a number of factors you can then consider. There can be an emphasis on further convictions or personal boundaries/necessities. Are you looking for a complimentarian or egalitarian congregation? One that is actively anti-racist and inter-generational? Does it include the presence of a nursery or youth group for children? All valid and important distinctions to consider.
Then, with all of those weighty considerations, I implore you to find a church that loves. That greets, welcomes, embraces, and invests in each person that walks through the doors. A church with people that will help you, and to grow in your faith with. If they make room to invest in you and give you the opportunity to do the same for others, I believe that is the sign of a healthy community that would be an excellent place to get involved in. And remember - don’t just look to be served in your new church, look for opportunities to serve others as well.
Ultimately, I believe our church search experience in America is a lot simpler than we make it out to be. If you’ve done the work to see if core beliefs and needs hold up to the congregation you have visited, then I encourage you to stay. And if you need to hear it from someone... It’s time to stop shopping. My friend, just pick a church.
